12 First Steps To Controlling What’s Controlling You

12 First Steps To Controlling What’s Controlling You

  1. Make a list of the areas where you are not demonstrating self-control. Consider all appetites, even if your struggle is only moderate.  Don’t get overwhelmed by this list-you are not going to try to fix them all at once.  But the list will give you something to prioritize and start working on.
  2. Makes a list of the lies you have been telling yourself. What lies and excuses are you using to allow yourself to continue in an unhealthy pattern?  Admit them and stop using them.  Here are a few examples:
  • “I don’t deserve to be loved.”
  • “I’ll never amount to anything.”
  • “I really love him, so sex is okay.”
  • “I can stop this whenever I want. I just don’t want to.”
  • “Everyone’s doing it.”
  1. Evaluate your self-talk. You need to become more aware of what you are saying to yourself because your self-talk can have a big influence on how you feel and act.  If you are constantly cutting yourself down and criticizing yourself, either in your head or out loud to others, you will have difficulty liking yourself or believing that you are capable of successfully making the necessary changes.  However, if you are positive about yourself and your ability to change, you’re halfway there.
  2. Make a list of healthy activities that bring you pleasure. Include the small day to day things that make you smile as well as bigger events you look forward to.  The more items you can come up with the better.  This list is going to help retrain your brain.  The more you can engage in the things you enjoy that are healthy for you, the more your brain will push you to act on these activities in times of stress so that the old, unhealthy behaviors remain a thing of the past.
  3. Confess, repent, and seek. Before you can grow spiritually, you must remove all barriers that stand between you and God. You must admit that you have been struggling with controlling your appetites and that these activities are sinful.  As you identify these sins in your life, you must confess and repent (decide to stop doing it).  Take time to seek the help of the Holy Spirit by asking for the strength and power necessary to make these changes.
  4. Grow in wisdom, knowledge, and understanding. If you hope to become more Christ-like, you must know what Christ is like.  Study God’s word on a daily basis and do your best to commit portions of it to memory so you will have it readily available to you when temptations come.  It is through God’s word that we gain an understanding of what He commands us to do, how the Holy Spirit works in our lives, and the promises God provides to us.
  5. Draw closer to God. There are two major