It is summer and many of my family and friends are on the move again! Moving is one of life’s top stressful events. It puts a strain on relationships and your bank balance and can turn even the most kind and gracious people into raving lunatics.
The average American will move 11.7 times in their lifetime. They may be moving because of a job change, desire to upsize their home, downsize their home, find a better neighborhood, live in their dream city, accommodate a new spouse, or our approaching retirement. Life is constantly changing and changing our environment to meet life’s current challenges is easier to do than ever.
Here are some tips I have compiled from my own experience and from other fellow movers to preserve your relationships and successfully move.
Protecting Your Relationships
Expect to live in chaos for a time.
Communicate when you don’t agree.
Make time to talk, schedule it if you have too. You must keep the communication open.
Manage expectations – expect exhaustion, frustration and stress.
Forgive insults and don’t play the blame game. You may have to extend more forgiveness than normal to your family members. Remember stress makes us do and say crazy things.
Physical expectations – you may have your body react to the stress you are feeling. You may feel anxiety, insomnia, headaches and nausea.
Prepare for second guessing – If you have purchased a new house or moved to a new city, one of you, you or your partner could suffer with “buyers regret”. That overwhelming feeling that you have done the wrong thing, you shouldn’t have bought this house or you shouldn’t have moved. This is a normal feeling but don’t trust it. If you truly, took time and made a sound decision this feeling will pass and the anxiety with it.
Expect disorientation – are you still surprised when you wake up that you aren’t in your old room. And where have you put all your things. Can you even find things? It may take a few months before this new place feels like home. It will take all of you a varying amount of time to adjust to the changes in the new environment. Don’t expect everyone to be on your timetable if you are the one to adjust first. I think it takes a year before you feel really settled. Kids seem to settle quicker than adults.
If you need to escape, go to the movies. Movies are very diverting and can let you escape your reality for a short time.
Focus on the positive – new kitchen, additional bathroom, new job, more closet space or a better location. There was a reason to move, repeat it like a mantra